Iraq is Going Fine

Posted by “George W. Bush”

I’d like to apologize for the below post.  Iraq is NOT in a state of Civil War.  Al-qaeda is trying to weaken our resolve with attacks that are overpublicized by a far too dovish media, who have always wanted this war to fail.

The majority of people are not being killed, over half have jobs, there is stability in much of the country.  This is hardly the free-for-all genocidal civil war the media and disgrunted ex-staffers are trying to convince the public of.

Democracy is working.  Freedom isn’t free, but we have made the lives of the Iraqistani’s much better.  We will constantly adjust tactics while staying the course until the job is done.  If we pullout now, the terrorists win.  If we don’t fight them over there, we will have to fight them over here.

Iraq is just days away from becoming a stable, pro-American, pro-business, Democracy, which will stand as an example to the entire Arab world.

Now if you’ll excuse I have a very important meeting which will solve all the problems of the Middle East.

What! He canceled!  Why?  Moqtada who?  What’s a Shi’ite?